The following appears in today’s edition of the Crikey newsletter:
by Guy Rundle (for Antony Loewenstein):
He was trucking down Carlisle St
With a bagel in his hand
Someone said to someone
Who is that awful man?
Him? Oh my dear I thought you knew
That’s the neurotic, self-hating Jew
He thinks it’s not impossible
That Israel is in error
And even if you’re airborne
Terror is still terror
Mass killing might be wrong!
Gosh even torture too?
Yes, amazingly, cos he’s a neurotic quite
psychotic, self-hating Jew
He believes peaceful neighbours
Can’t be built from rubble
And it’s possible that Begin
Was Arafat sans stubble
That Dershowitz is crazy
And Danby might be too
He’s a neurotic, psychotic, ingrate
third rate, self-hating Jew
He’s pretty sure that AIJACS
Will get a surface clean
(sotto voce: Gaza for example)
But you shouldn’t inhale it,
If you know what I mean
He disagrees with Leibler (gasps)
So alas it must be true
He’s a third rate, ingrate, simple inexplicable,
Utterly despicable, neurotic, quite psychotic, blue meanie party pooping self-hating Jew
He thinks that Eretz Israel
Needs someone to restrain her
Says he likes chopped liver
But not if it’s called “Qana”
He’s a yarmulke-wearing mullah
And once we’ve whacked Hezbollah
(any day now)
We’ll settle his hash too
Ingrate third rate, neurotic, quite psychotic
Vanunu in a muu-muu, self-hating Jew.
Well Guy Rundle congrats, you have successfully utilized the most basic form of poetry to convey not only how incredibly ignorant you are, but also show your readers that you have no mature arguement against your adversary.
I also note that numerous parts of his little rhyme there (that he used to back up his points) are actually quite relevent to current events (against his arguement).
And speaking of Dershowitz, I just watched the Chomsky Vs Dershowitz debate (Dec 2005). No words can explain how (with respect to Dershowitz’s credentials) he cannot hold a debate to save his life. If I had a dollar for every time he rebutted Chomsky with the line “Yeh maybe on Planet Chomsky” I’d buy a plane ticket to America and punch the guy.
On the other side of it, Chomsky always backs up his point saying “Dont take my word for it, check the sources”.
Why does the Dershmeister even bother.
That’s so weird,
After reading the poem, I got the feeling that Rundle was actually mocking Ant’s critics.
Who can read words like “Utterly despicable, neurotic, quite psychotic, blue meanie party pooping self-hating Jew” and not think this guy is taking the piss?
If indeed he is serious, then Rundle has just portrayed Israeli appologists and Zionists is the worst possible light. Like you said M.Mayes, by mentions relevant current events, and merely rebuitting them with self hating Jew, he illistrated perfectly how dsperate and pressed for logic Ant’s critics are.
Talk about a massive own goal.
As for Desrchbag, he’s become a travelling freak show. I’m sure even the Zionsit corner wishe he would shut up.
It’s gotta be a piss take, though I would add that it is definitely strange. I’m off to check out that debate between Chomsky and Dershowitz.
People.
It’s a piss-take. Quite clearly. Directed at those whose arsenal of criticisms are meagre, to say the least.
Rundle get’s full marks in that case.
I read it as ironic. But interesting that people weren’t sure- obviously “He’s a third rate, ingrate, simple inexplicable, Utterly despicable, neurotic, quite psychotic, blue meanie party pooping self-hating Jew” is not quite extreme enough to distinguish it from the genuine insults received recently.
Oh! He forgot the “Cheerleader for Hezbollah” Lapkin insult. Nice poem though – really does show up the pathetic nature of all the personal attacks that have been flying around against Antony over the last month in particular.
It’s rather well done for mine. I could have done with a few more verses; there’s plenty of raw material.
My wife, the Gilbert and Sullivan fan, liked it.
Being Sydney-based Ant would be getting his bagels from somewhere other than Carlisle St, right? It’s in St Kilda. (My guess would be the Wellington St Cake Shop…)
M.Mayes, ta for intriguing me to look up The Chomsky Vs Dershowitz debate.
It’s worth a listen for anyone who is curious. Dershowitz’s bizarre personal suggestion that the West Bank apartheid wall be constructed “on wheels” was more than worth it (to be dismantled when those pesky Palestinians renounced terrorism of course).
I thought that the roving Israeli checkpoints would have more than compensated, but the thought of a massive concrete wall being shoved backwards and forwards according to (presumably) how well behaved the Palestinians had been that week, is an irresistable image for me.
http://www.democracynow.org/article.pl?sid=05/12/23/1450216
Laughed out loud when I read it yesterday Antony. I’m sure there were many critics of yours that were nodding their heads in agreement. It’ll be interesting to read Crikey’s letters page in response because I’m sure there will be many that didn’t get the joke.
It is interesting how during the Chomsky Vs Dershowitz debate, Deshbag switched between major arse kissing and the Plant Chomsky remarks.
I recall that Chomsky also made a referene to Jewish roads, which made Deshbag go into a Laptkin type tizz.
I thought it was rather funny.
It’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever read. Antony simply must include it in the preface to the second edition of his book.
Ant should be appreciated for making sure his sycophantic gang didn’t get the nuance wrong.
How could anyone be so audacious to claim that Ant was a self-hating Jew when these page are full of his sympathy for Jews who have been terrorised by Hamas, Hezbollah etc. ?
The poem or what ever it might have been did make me laugh. Did someone actually sit there and right this thing? Strikes me how much effort they put into it.
People should remember that Ant is not on any ones payroll that he writing against Israel, he speaks and writes of his experience and what he feels and I credit him for this. This type of work is well overdue but one also has to remember that every action has a reaction, and this poem is merely a reaction from an action.
While Israel is operating a massive humanitarian aid program under the guise of state sponsored terror and genocide.
It has truly come to the point where Israel is making no effort to avoid innocent civilian casualties, and if that’s not bad it committing war crimes and state level terrorism in front of the International arena without trying to at least hide its intension. Self defense means self defense not genocide or war crimes and state terrorism.
That can be put into a question, who has been terrorized by Hamas or Hezbollah? The answer would be no one; these two groups are popular resistance and political groups as opposed to terrorists. Sometimes it makes me wonder if the west and pro-Israeli lovers know the definition of terrorism (as it would suit the illegal state of Israel more than any other). The two (and other) groups have been formed due to the illegal occupation of Palestine and the increase of war crimes, genocide and state level terror committed to the innocent civilians living in their land.
Who has been terrorized by Hamas and Hezbollah? No one? Get real.
Understanding what motivates Hamas and Hezbollah – Israeli apartheid – in no way excuses this type of statement.
If I understand my history, Hamas and Hezbollah are terrorist organizations formed as a direct result of Israeli attempts at the destruction of the Palestinian society and the Lebanese society.
Israel is a terrorist nation that operates on the basis of apartheid internally, and colonialism (via extreme violence and ethnic cleansing) externally. The attempts to colonize Lebanese land currently, for example. For large parts of its history Israel has engaged in ethnic cleansing very slowly – slowly enough to be largely ignored by the mainstream media. Admittedly, the levels of terrorism Hamas and Hezbollah engage in does not approach the levels that Israel engages in; but to say that Hamas and Hezbollah do not engage in terrorism is dishonest.
The act of lobbing missiles into Israel that have very little chance of hitting military targets and the act of suicide bombing are two examples of terrorism. Provocation does not provide justification.
Edwin,
I appears you do not understand your history, at least not entirely..
Hezbollah is NOT a terrorist organisation, but was born as a resistance movement to Israeli occupation in 1982. Had Israel not invaded Lebanon (under another false pretext), there would have been no reason for guerrilla groups to form to strike back at the IDF.
Hamas was actually the child of Israel – Israel took Hamas under it’s wing after the 1967 war to foster an opposition group to the PLO. Both Hezbollah and Hamas have militant arms and well as those that provide serviced to their people. Hamas runs social programs and charities and is widely recognised for it’s efficiency. Hezbollah plays a large role in Lebanon’s society at all levels.
Certainly, Hamas has since engaged in terrorism against Israel, but there is more to it that just terror for the sake of it.
What terrorism has Hezbollha actually engaged in? Grabbing two IDF solders who may or may not have been on Lebanese soil at the time of the incident?
The act of lobbing missiles into Israel is to be condemned, but in terms of terrorism, it is an order of magnitude less than what Israel is doing to Lebanon
Sure, but let’s e honest here – what Israel is doing is NTO self defence. If the cessation of rockets being fired into Israel was the ultimate goal, then all Israel need to is accept a ceasefire, which Hezbollah has called for.
Israel’s refusal to accept at ceasefire and the US vetoes at the UN are proof that this is an act of blatant aggression on Israel’s part.
Ah yes, if only Israel do as Hezbollah directs then everything will be fine.
And of course Hezbollah is not a terrorist organisation, the Australian government are merely parrots of the big satan for calling Hezbollah terrorists. And so too for Hamas. We should not consider that they suck people in with their bogus welfare programs and then use them to be suicide bombers. The exploitation of the palestinian people by their own is something that should just not be considered.
After all, what does it matter about blowing up a bus when Israel is just mean. Surely these Jews deserve it. People have been killing Jews in every generation, there must be some real reason behind it!
And really what are these Israelis complaining about with a few kidnappings and a few thousand missiles? I mean really, what is wrong with living in bomb shelters? Surely the Lebanese should not be punished for extending hospitality to Islamofascists. It cant be their fault. They are just good hosts!
And of course who can walk past the greatest Goebellian lie: that the Jews created the Jew haters. Hamas was the child of Israel just as Hitler was the child of German Jews.
Oh good one Captain,
The Australian government is such a maverick, that makes decisions all it’s own.
Without any basis in fact, it remains a theory and impossible to prove, unless you can prove that everyone the welfare programs are bogus and that everyone who get’s sucked into their welfare programs becomes a suicide bombers.
The same could be said for the IDF. Force every Israeli into military service so that they can learn more than one way to kill children.
Blowing up a bit is tragic, but far less significant that blowing up a building with 37 children inside when you know they are sleeping. Of course, 80% of Israelis are behind these actions, which must mean that 80% of Israel are in favor of slaughtering children.
People have been also killing whites, blacks, Protestants, and Catholics too for centuries. It’s only a tragedy though when it happens to Jews right Captain?
What about when Israeli Jews slighter 1000 Egyptian POW’s after forcing them to dig their own graves?
Especially seeing as those rockets are useless compared to 1000 pound bombs or that the IDF soldiers who were grabbed were in Lebanon at the time anyway?
Yeah that’s gotta be rough, especially seeing as mobile phone signals get cut off so easily and cable TV connection gets interrupted. Much better to love in Qana were you can breathe in the dust from buildings and inhale the smell of burning flesh.
Especially when they are not.
BTW. As if ayone needed convincing, it is comming out that Hezbollas did not start the conflict with Israel.
The Israeli attack on Lebanon had been many months in the planning. Bush and Blair knew in advance of the Israeli plans and did nothing to stop them.
John Kampfner, in the New Statesman, 7th August 2006, writes:
http://www.newstatesman.com/200608070017
http://story.malaysiasun.com/p.x/ct/9/cid/b8de8e630faf3631/id/26abaeefa963aed1/
Ah yes, Israel organised the kidnapping of its own soldiers, organised Iran to fund and arm Hezbollah with tens of thousands of missiles, then organised for their cities to be bombed so it would have an excuse to implement a greater israel strategy of wiping out Hezbollah and destroying lebanon. What, because neo-cons in America ordered it? Oh, and Blair was in on it so London deserves to be bombed. Its amazing how many people were in on this secret deal just to appease expansionist Israeli interests. No doubt you are now going to claim that Hezbollah is the bastard child of Israel and Iran.
And once again, how can Ant be a self hating Jew when he shows such compassion for murdered Jews?
According to the Christian Science Monitor, Israel has made regular incursions, almost daily into Lebanon since 2000. Some of those had been violent, resulting in the killing of innocents in Lebanon.
Hezbollah is armed and funder by Syria and Iran the way Israel is armed and funded by the US. Any militant group has a right to accumulate arms. But to say that Hezbollah is just a front for Iran is like saying Israel is a US puppet – quite the contrary.
Israel planned the invasion into Lebanon a year ago and used the one incident to put their plans into motion. How can anyone doubt that Israel want to grab back the Southern part of Lebanon up to the LItani River, when IDF Generals are boating about being ready to occupy it?
Who said that Captain? You grand master Zionist teacher?
Not amazing at all. It’s been part of a plan for years, Israel is running out of fresh water – the Jordan River is about to run dry. Also, with the US plans to isolate Iran on the nuclear weapons proliferation running aground, they needed a new pretext to draw Iran/blame Iran and create another pretext to attack them. The US is already sharing NSA data with Israel to try and pin the blame on Syria and Iran.
Logic says so. Hezbollah did not exist before 9182. No 1982 invasion of Lebanon, no Hezbollah.
Since when has he not? Oh I forgot, compassion for Jews does not leave room for compassion for Israel’s victims – including babies to young to even be named.
You never answered Captain whether you thought the Qana bombing would be sufficient to generate more anger towards Israel and whether the only reason Arabs could have for hating Israel is Islamofasism?
Here’s a couple of interesting quotes that sums up how the founding fathers of Israel really thought:
( David Ben-Gurion, Quoted on pp 855-56 in Shabtai Teveth’s Ben-Gurion)
So much for exploiting your own people. No one does it better.
Ben-Gurion in 1937
And to think, Israel named a university after this lunatic.
Once again, fake quotes.
Ben Gurion wanted to live in peace with arabs.
Funny how any quotes you don’t seem to like you deem to be fake. No the are factual quotes.
Ben Guiron wanted to make peace with the the Arabs the same way Hitleer wanted to make peace with Jews.
What makes you such a source of ridicule Captain is that you cannot for one second aknowledge the shortcomming of Israel and it’s extremist leaders. Everythng that happens some else’s fault. Just like a child who refuses to grow up.
Just to prove that Israel was founded on terrorism. Who needs a charter to eradicate Arabs when you have ertremists liek this representing the majority? islamofascism has nothign on Judeofascim.
– David Ben-Gurion, May 1948, to the General Staff. From Ben-Gurion, A Biography, by Michael Ben-Zohar, Delacorte, New York 1978.
– David Ben Gurion, quoted on pp 91-2 of Chomsky’s Fateful Triangle, which appears in Simha Flapan’s “Zionism and the Palestinians pp 141-2 citing a 1938 speech.
– Quoted by Nahum Goldmann in Le Paraddoxe Juif (The Jewish Paradox), pp. 121-122.
– Yitzhak Rabin, leaked censored version of Rabin memoirs, published in the New York Times, 23 October 1979.
– Isreali Prime Minister (at the time) Yitzhak Shamir in a speech to Jewish settlers New York Times April 1, 1988
– Benyamin Netanyahu, then Israeli Deputy Foreign Minister, former Prime Minister of Israel, speaking to students at Bar Ilan University, from the Israeli journal Hotam, November 24, 1989.
– Ehud Barak’s response to Gideon Levy, a columnist for the Ha’aretz newspaper, when Barak was asked what he would have done if he had been born a Palestinian.
– Ariel Sharon, Israeli Foreign Minister, addressing a meeting of militants from the extreme right-wing Tsomet Party, Agence France Presse, November 15, 1998.
– Ariel Sharon, Israeli Foreign Minister, addressing a meeting of the Tsomet Party, Agence France Presse, Nov. 15, 1998.
– Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon, 25 March, 2001 quoted in BBC News Online
Addamo, that’s an valuable selection of quotations. Thanks.
“They [our Arab Neighbors] in turn have much to give us, they are blessed with what we lack. Great territories, ample for themselves and their children’s children, even if they are far more prolific than they are today. We do not covet their expanses nor will we penetrate them – for we shall fight to end Diaspora in Arab lands as fiercely as we fought to end it in Europe, we want to be assembled wholly in our own Land. But if this region is to expand to the full, there must be reciprocity, there can be mutual aid – economic, political and cultural – between Jew and Arab. That is the necessity which will prevail, and the daily fulminations of their leaders should not alarm us unduly – they do not echo the real interests of the Arab peoples. David Ben Gurion, Speech to the elected assembly of Palestinian Jews, October 2, 1947
“In the midst of wanton aggression, we still call upon the Arab inhabitants of the State of Israel to return to the ways of peace and play their part in the development of the State, with full and equal citizenship and due representation in its bodies and institutions – provisional or permanent.
We offer peace and neighborliness to all the neighboring states and their peoples, and invite them to cooperate with the independent Hebrew nation for the common good of all.” Israeli Declaration of Independence, May 14, 1948
Addamo I applaud you for your patience, its people like captain who create serial killers.
The incompetence, baseless accusations and western dogma spewing from captains mouth is deplorable.
Captain your black and white view of the world is a childish fantasy that you amongst many others indulge in(“They say they want to secure their Oh, and Blair was in on it so London deserves to be bombed.”)…
I think you will find that on here you are arguing with moderates. You talk about support for Islamofacism but on numerous occasions we have condemned islamofacism… You are the only extremist here, either that or you are just a child blinded by his leaders.
Addamo
You are clearly a very clever chappie to be able to track down quotes from four, five, and six decades, hell even one century ago!! But why don’t you live in the NOW!? Or at least in the past generation.
We wonder if your forensic skills extend to tracking down an equally representative selection of Islamist quotes?
Viva,
Yeah right Viva, Sharon’s quotes were from 1998. You call that past generations? Nice try though.
No doutb they exist. The point is that Captain abnd others do list these statememts to paint Islamic leaders are being dangeorus to Israel and the West in general. That statements liek these are as proof of intent to kill.
Captain insists that Irsrael onyl wants peace, when their actions speak entirely the opposite. I have always maitained that actions speak louder than words.
I’m not sure what thought processes you would need to use to understand that “The Ballad …” is anything other than Guy Rundle poetically taking the piss out of the by now raging and ferociously belligerent Israeli propagandists and apologists.